Fearless Friday: Gay Marriage

I've noticed that a lot of bloggers do something called "Wordless Wednesday". So I've decided to make up my own alliterative clever... and do "Fearless Friday". Instead of whining or patting myself on the back about my life, this will be my day to choose something controversial to ramble on about. Mostly just to amuse myself... but also to release some aggression.

So here goes, right? :) Today's topic: "Gay-ness."... "Lesbian-ism" and even..."Homosexuality". As well as their right to shack up together after preforming a ceremony uniting them in the eyes of the law as two people who have entered into a business arrangement to file taxes together and be financially responsible for one another. You know... romance.

Why in the Heavens would I choose this one right off the bat?!?!? I mean... the gulf is gushing oil... the state of Texas has lost it's damn mind... and everyone is about to kill each other over whether or not we're turning communist. (Or is it socialist? Or marxist? And what do those all REALLY mean anyway... hmmm... :)

Well... here it is. My "opinionist-ism".

Number one thing on my list of grievances: Does the "Religious Right" realize that in nature... species go homosexual when there are too many males and not enough females? This is a scientifically proven fact. This "against nature" (not to mention, their very own Creator's great plan) homosexuality in animals who want to get laid... but lack the resources. I'm wondering about that particular Bible passage where God smite the homosexual animals of Sodom and Gomorrah. Perhaps one will find it in "Songs of Solomon" where it's cool for grown men to have sex with little girls and relatives? Let me know.

Punto número dos: "Sanctity of Marriage". When I consider what is sacred within marriage, I think that it is pretty much outlined by our rights within the constitution as free individuals and between two consenting adults. In other words, what Bill and I find sacred between us is really none of anyone's damn business, as long as we're both in agreement. What does happen to be the most "sacred" within the confines of our agreement with the State of California and the Federal Government to report our income as one unit? A sense of humor. Which I doubt very much is unique to a heterosexual relationship... or in The Bible.

What I do realize, however, is that it IS really, really universally important when children are involved... that people hold their responsibility as parents sacred after creating them. For this... I actually applaud a few of the "Christian" based religions on their ways for ensuring that when two of their committed people create another life... they stay together. Fear of "Damnation" to be sure that a kid has at least two people to go to with problems... I'm for it, if that's what it takes. I'm not at all down on single parents or people who leave abusive/totally dysfunctional relationships. One needs to do in this life the best they can with what they got. Plenty of very good and well adjusted people come from single parent families. Statistically speaking, however, children with two parents are overall more well adjusted.

And let us talk statistics for a moment-o... shall we? The current heterosexual divorce rate is over 50%. Does anyone want to venture the guess for just the "split up" ratio of a couple that is gay or lesbian ... and adopts? :) Less than 15%. Probably due to the effort involved for a committed pair of same sex people... who obviously cannot just have sex and "accidentally" conceive another human to raise... but instead have to go through a myriad of paper work... and visits... and testimony by others... (which is all normal)... but then... scrutiny of others who fear they want to abuse/molest/enslave these children. So let me ask you something, if I may: Given the amount of effort it takes to adopt a child if you are gay or lesbian... can we all just agree there probably is no "Damnation"? In conjunction with the amount of heterosexual couples who do, in fact, make children they adopt all about abuse? Can we just agree that the selfless act of individuals raising a child who screams "I hate you!!!" when you give them Honey Nut Cheerios instead of Coco Pops... and then can still find it in their hearts to celebrate every accomplishment and wipe every tear... deserves your support?? Seriously. There should be "Sainthood" given for it. That completely normal... and completely defiant child DID NOT COME FROM THEIR WOMB. (Or... you know... Testes.) Most of the time, there was no "baby bonding period." God called... He agrees with me and decided many years ago (when He created us the way we are) that there is a special place for all who adopt. And they all get the same tax breaks in Heaven for it. Sorry to disappoint.

Further more, on the point of "sanctity"... what exactly is to be preserved? I cannot for the life of me see what it is that is better or holier or superior in regards to your every day man and woman "marriage" vs. your lesbian neighbors and their "relationship". Speaking from experience... which is really all we have right?... I married young. It didn't work. We split up and I found a new, happier life. We had no children, which I (personally) feel is the one reason you should always think twice when you're unhappy. You're children deserve for you two to try your utmost to make it work, at the very LEAST. In my case, though... we were young and inexperienced and free. So we left each other and attempted again in life to find what would make us happy. Why is the divorce that I filed for not any big thing and pretty much just accepted as the way it is now days... but when it comes to granting Gay and Lesbians the right to join forces... well, shit. We can't do that. They'll be marrying each other left and right and then filing for divorce in no time. It will be a free for all... these "gays" running out... getting married... divorcing. Mass hysteria. Cats and dogs, living together...

So seriously... what are we "preserving" with all our argument of "sanctity"? Good luck on that answer, my friend. Because you know what it is we're actually preserving? Our inclination as human beings to look down on others and discriminate. That's all it is. When you were little, you did that. You choose your elementary school friends based on who you felt comfortable with. You played together on the playground and traded lunch and other various treasures with them. You sat next to them. And the weird kids who either smelled funny, looked funny or acted different from you... you stayed away from. If your personality is to lash out at the different... you bullied them. If you're a non-confrontational... you either ignored them or you faked kindness when necessary, and hurried back to your group. Whatever your style... you choose your friends, hung with them and could only wonder what it is that others did when they were together hanging out.

Know what they were doing? Playing together and trading lunches and other various treasures, same as you. Probably just different games, food and stuff is all. And that is ALL this really boils down to. We elitist "heterosexuals" with our finger on the pulse of what it is that makes a marriage work... with our 50%+ divorce "grading curve", of course... we don't know what those "gays" do when they're all "married"... and shit. We know they're having all that "gay sex"... (which of course upsets the majority of us because of our own occasional (or constant) same sex attractions)... but other than the insanely wild gay sexfest we can't stop thinking about, we're at a loss. What are they doing??!? What are they doing over there, in that extremely stylish condo, being all "married"?

We'll... since I know a lot of "the gays" personally... I'll tell you. I'll TOTALLY let you in... and perhaps I'll win some kind of peacekeeping award, because I promise you'll feel better. Come close.

Know what they're doing over there? Making breakfast. Using the restroom. Complaining back and forth to one another about the little annoying habits that they both have. Discussing family/friend/co-worker/acquaintance gossip. Hurting when one says something unkind to the other one. Worrying about their jobs/bills/mortgages/kids/sick parents. Flipping through 500+ channels and being irritated that nothing is on. Lying awake in the bedroom wondering why their spouse is out watching TV instead of coming to bed. Dreaming about accomplishing goals. BBQing and drinking Corona with lime on a hot day. I know this all may sound a little "foreign". Hard to imagine, even.

I will tell you one thing, though. Their condo is sure to be a LOT swankier than yours. So I actually propose that instead of publicly making an ass out of yourself... not to mention looking completely ignorant and hateful... you instead take a baby step today and make gay and lesbians your "frenemies". Let's go ahead and get over our discrimination and wanting for un-equality, circa pre-1954. Let's instead do what any good hearted, yet jealous, person would do... and allow an even playing field. It makes sitting around and gossiping much, much more fun. :)